Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Can't Sleep

It's 2 am and I'm still awake! Not only am I awake, but i am wide awake and there are no sheep or counting crows that can put theses eyes to rest. I hate not being able to sleep, but then again I am not a fan of the chemical induced sleep eiither. This insommia bug seems to be bitting more then ever lately as all the things that are happening in my personal or work life come to front and unfold daily. Insommia, on the other hand is something that can be useful too! It can be a great study time, since there is nothing and I mean nothing on TV between the hours 230am and 430am. Then the morning news and all the world is coming awake, to start their new day. I on the other hand have slept may 30 mins to 3 hours depending on the night and how bad the bug is bitting at my toes.

Yet, I am able to go 3 maybe 4 days with little to no sleep at all then by the 5th day all seems to crash, and that restful, peaceful sleep tends to find me and take me off to the land of dreams if I am so lucky. Pleastville bound in the world of dreams and rest for all. But, then again my mind won't stop or even if I can truely clear my mind I am not able to drift off to the clouds of neverland, because the insommina bug is there at my toes reminding me that tonight is a night that you stay up and sleep is just not allowed.

I have heard it said that warm milk, prayer, reading a text book on a subject that one just dreads will put one to to sleep. Nope, all they do is bore me to tears, and yet the milk is not an option either, unless I want a day of running to the bathroom from drinking one glass. So here we are, at 3am and not a care in the world, and not a bit tired tonight.

I have heard that it is during this time that God is trying to get our attention. Well, he has my full attention, since sleep is not going to visit me tonight. Now if I can figure out what I am supposed to be praying for or whom I am to pray for that too would be a blessing. I have sat here night after night and poured in God's word looking for the answers on pleasent slumber. I found the scriptures, claimed them as my own, and come to realize that it is in these wee am hours that I am longing for the Heavenly Fathers touch, a word from His heart. Something that will draw me in close to the holy of holies. In that place were there is nothing in the room but me and the Father or Jesus. A time where I draw unto Him, and He unto I, where I am totally encompassed in His love, joy, and peace! A place that one can only go when they press on in prayer, worship and seeking the face of the Lord. Yes, I have insommina and I miss my sleep, but I long for the wee hours of the morning where I am encompassed in the love of the Lord, where I feel His presence all around, and His arms there hold me is better then any night of sleep!

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